4:30 Blues

I have been noticing that since being back, every weekday about 4:30pm I start getting sad. It is connected to the realization that another day has gone by without an update or news on our adoption process. Usually emails from our case worker come first thing in the morning or around 4-5pm.

I've been hoping for either an email saying we have PA (those have actually been coming on Saturdays) and even more so this week, an email with a medical update. We typically get those once a month, after Samuel has had his x month checkup. He turned 4 months on 6/7 and yet no update. Of course we were there with him when he turned 4 months, so I know it was most likely the next week that he went to the doctor. I'm not anxious for pictures, but just for something to document how he is doing.

I suppose it stems from a whole week of watching his every breath. Of knowing all that he was doing. And the last I saw was on June 8th, him leaving in a taxi with the foster family. Did they make it to the bus ok? How was their five hour journey home? Did he have to adjust back? Does he miss us?

It is so much harder to wait now that we have experienced his presence.

Come on PA and come on Medical Update.